End of a chapter… or start of a new?

14 04 2014

So, where to start?

You will notice if you read through my old posts that one of my favourite phrases is “life’s rich tapestry”. I use it a lot because I like it!

And, yet again our tapestry is being woven by life in a complicated and tricky pattern, its taking some balls to wade through it!.

After nearly 2 years in Gladys, sadly, the time has come for us to move into a more conventional place once again. There are a few reasons but the main one is for Alistair. He has taken a bit of a nose dive in terms of his health over the past few months and to be honest the comfort and space of conventional living is right now the most important thing for him. Its seems to have been forever that this bloody prostate cancer has been going on. Don’t get me wrong, there has been lots of time over the past 2  1/2 years when he has felt really well and looked amazing, but when these ‘not so well’ spells come along its really tough going. At the moment he is in a lot of pain and seems to be peeing blood on a daily basis. According to the last registrar we saw at The Royal this is normal, but I can tell you its disconcerting when its ongoing.

He succumbed to the request of his registrar and went ahead with some scans a couple of weeks ago and we are hoping to get the results this Thursday. For anybody that has been in this situation you will know exactly what this time feels like. We half want to know and half don’t want to know. Its been difficult for Alistair to keep his spirit up, especially over the last few weeks. It seems to coincide with hospital visits, he gets lost in the negativity of the medical model, seems to lose his power and fight. Thats no good, without his fight he will sink, not happening, no way, so I must rally myself , dig deep and keep positive for both of us. Not so easy but definitely achievable, especially having a few people that I can off load on to, that gives me a chance to unburden my fears and then regroup and get on again.

Tonight though he is a bit more positive and seems like he is getting his mojo back again. I think if we can get some pain management in place he will be able to see a way forward again.

So, back to our move. Synchronicity has been at its very best over the last 2 weeks to secure our new little abode. Saw it a good few weeks ago, loved it from the outside, no the landlady wouldn’t allow pets so we deleted it from our list. It remained on the market unlet so we asked again, would she consider a dog… yes she would think about… 2 days later….she’s thought abut it and No, she wouldn’t feel comfortable allowing a dog. So with heavy hearts but trusting the universe would help us find the right place we let go of it. 30 minutes later….there had been a change of heart could we go and meet her with Archie. So we drove off to Saffron Walden on the 5th April, met the most lovely land lady and were just delighted to view the most quirky and peaceful feeling garden flat, with,a long garden for Archie and a small overgrown vegetable plot for me to grow my own organic veg…synchronicity at its very best and quite a few prayers from my sister and niece no doubt.

Gladys has been an amazing home for us for almost 2 years, she has served us well and taught us so much, and those learnings will stand us in good stead as our new chapter  unfolds.

So on Good Friday aided by our little band of family helpers we will begin the next chapter of our lives…and hope and pray and ask all things in love and light from the universe that life is what Alistair has much much more of





2 responses

15 04 2014
Gordon Darge (@goberre)

Rebekah, I barely know you, I think we only met that weekend for Keb’s leaving do, but I can tell you are a loving caring human being which must be a great strength for Alistair. You dig deep Lassie, Alistair needs you. I send my love to you both. Gordon x

15 04 2014

Hi Gordon
Thats lovely, thank you, I love to start the day with a few tears xxx he has a great plan and his spirit is rising as we speak, whatever the news, we will strengthen our resolve x

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